The Basics: Let’s start with the basic aspects you can frame healthy boundaries around. Your SpaceYou have the right to personal space, the basics of not having people touching you but also your room. You can have a personal bubble and have places in your home that are only yours. Space is important and hard for … Continue reading Advice: Healthy Boundaries
Advice Post: How To Start Talking About Our Abuse Stories
Talking About Our Abuse Stories Putting Words to The Abuse: Drawing can be a good first step to allowing thoughts to be externalized. Music and dancing even can be a way to communicate the way the body and subconscious carry trauma in a way that words don’t always understand. Journaling is often a good way … Continue reading Advice Post: How To Start Talking About Our Abuse Stories
Advice: Telling people about the Abuse
Getting Started: Fear of how people will react to sharing stories of abuse is really common. Sharing our histories and reaching out for help is extremely hard, that’s normal. But it is healing and important to tell people what happened to move forward and find the support you need. A good place start is making … Continue reading Advice: Telling people about the Abuse
Question: How do you Stop Mourning a Lost Childhood?
You don’t, not really. In complete honesty, the reason your grieving is because you have too. What is going to help you get over the pain is to let yourself feel sad, angry, scared, hurt,lost, depressed and so confused. It hurts like hell but healing is never pretty. It's good to think about someone who … Continue reading Question: How do you Stop Mourning a Lost Childhood?
Question: How Do I Stop Being Angry at My Parents for Not Protecting me?
You can’t stop being angry by forcing yourself to do it. In general, you can’t force emotions, of any kind. Anger makes sense and is important. Anger at your parents for not protecting you, is something really common for survivors rather it’s their direct fault, or they were oblivious, or just didn’t listen. Telling yourself … Continue reading Question: How Do I Stop Being Angry at My Parents for Not Protecting me?
Question: How can I be brave enough to say the terms ‘rape’ and shared details of trauma?
You can write about it put the details on paper. You don’t have to share all of those details with people but it can help it feel less bottled up and more acceptable to say if you have made it real on paper. After writing you can try saying rape and other specifics to yourself. … Continue reading Question: How can I be brave enough to say the terms ‘rape’ and shared details of trauma?
Coping Skills: Healing A Relationship With Sex After Sexual Abuse
This post is going to focus on our relationship mainly with the concept of sex, masturbation and partner sex. Sexual violence at any age will affect the way the victim of the violence relates to sex. This is heightened with trauma at exceptionally young ages as the survivors never developed a relationship to sex in … Continue reading Coping Skills: Healing A Relationship With Sex After Sexual Abuse
Question: Do you have any advice for feeling like it’s all your fault?
Affirmations really can go a long way. Reminding yourself “it was never my fault”, “I did nothing wrong.” “I was only a child.” Can help. And saying them out loud really helps make it stronger. Saying words out loud really has power. Talking to someone about it can help. A therapist or a trusted friend. They will generally remind … Continue reading Question: Do you have any advice for feeling like it’s all your fault?