Intrusive thoughts are not things we actually want to do. If you do not actively want to sexually act on children and don’t experience sexual attraction to children. Intrusive thoughts are a mental health issue that are upsetting, other thoughts like murder, driving the car off the road, or other forms of sexual violence happen … Continue reading Question: Does having intrusive thoughts about children make me an abuser?
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Question: How is it possible that the brain forgets abuse if its such a traumatizing event?
It’s because it’s traumatic that memories can be repressed, not in spite of. It’s not the same as saying you forget what you had for breakfast three days ago where your mind just never puts it in long term memory. Memories of trauma don’t go through the normal process of how the brain handles everyday things … Continue reading Question: How is it possible that the brain forgets abuse if its such a traumatizing event?
Question: How do you Stop Mourning a Lost Childhood?
You don’t, not really. In complete honesty, the reason your grieving is because you have too. What is going to help you get over the pain is to let yourself feel sad, angry, scared, hurt,lost, depressed and so confused. It hurts like hell but healing is never pretty. It's good to think about someone who … Continue reading Question: How do you Stop Mourning a Lost Childhood?
Question: How Do I Stop Being Angry at My Parents for Not Protecting me?
You can’t stop being angry by forcing yourself to do it. In general, you can’t force emotions, of any kind. Anger makes sense and is important. Anger at your parents for not protecting you, is something really common for survivors rather it’s their direct fault, or they were oblivious, or just didn’t listen. Telling yourself … Continue reading Question: How Do I Stop Being Angry at My Parents for Not Protecting me?
Questions: Can abuse be Traumatic if you were unaware is was abuse at the time?
Thinking abuse is normal, even how sex and relationships should work, is common with CSA survivors. Most children don’t understand if and/or why sexual abuse is wrong. Kids don’t have a frame of reference of normal sexual interaction and are generally told by their abuser this is normal, this how relationships should go. If the … Continue reading Questions: Can abuse be Traumatic if you were unaware is was abuse at the time?
Question: How can I be brave enough to say the terms ‘rape’ and shared details of trauma?
You can write about it put the details on paper. You don’t have to share all of those details with people but it can help it feel less bottled up and more acceptable to say if you have made it real on paper. After writing you can try saying rape and other specifics to yourself. … Continue reading Question: How can I be brave enough to say the terms ‘rape’ and shared details of trauma?
Question: How do you learn to let people love you?
It takes time to gather trust in other people when you have been abused. Fear is common and normal. Experiencing sexual urges as someone who is sex repulsed isn’t contradictory in all cases. Sexual trauma wrecks havoc on the experience of sexuality that survivors experience. Sex repulsion isn’t the same as never experiencing the attraction or … Continue reading Question: How do you learn to let people love you?
Question: Do you have any advice for feeling like it’s all your fault?
Affirmations really can go a long way. Reminding yourself “it was never my fault”, “I did nothing wrong.” “I was only a child.” Can help. And saying them out loud really helps make it stronger. Saying words out loud really has power. Talking to someone about it can help. A therapist or a trusted friend. They will generally remind … Continue reading Question: Do you have any advice for feeling like it’s all your fault?
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